The beginning...

I am asking myself, "Why Blog"?  "Why make public what is a very private struggle?"  My answer... "Because maybe I can help someone else and myself at the same time".  By making this public, I am accountable.  To myself, and to you.  It is all out there, no hiding, no excuses!!!

It is really amazing how you can go through your life without seeing yourself until you have that “oh heck” moment when you are forced to face what you have allowed yourself to become.

I have been overweight my entire life, but truly thought “it’s not that bad”, “I’m not that heavy”. I probably would have been happy to continue along unhealthy and unaware if it were not for my “Oh Heck” moment.  My moment was a humiliating 5 minutes of my life that completely redefined how I thought and felt about myself.  I was boarding an airplane to go to Florida on a business trip.  Yeah the seats are small, but I have never had a moment like this.  As I sat down in my seat and reached for the belt to buckle up, I realized there was a good 4 inches to go to get it done up.  I looked around for the “right” belt.  Of course I was trying to use the one for the other seat… right?  Nope.  Right seatbelt.  Okay, suck it in and pull those ends together.  No go.  Scoot back in the seat and suck it in more.  No go.  My sweet husband then gets up and grabs both ends of the belt and attempts to force them together.  By now all of my seat mates and many in the surrounding rows have become aware of my dilemma.  The stewardess comes by with a “seatbelt extender”.  Says loudly, “You need a seatbelt extension”.  Then hands the offending piece of equipment to the man at the end of the row who then passes it to me.  I hunched up in my seat, now securely fastened and tried to disappear.  When did I get so heavy?  How could I not have noticed?  That day began my quest for change.  The quest for weight loss.  The quest for health and vitality.  

To begin -

I began to actually move my body.  I started walking and watching the calories that I was eating.  I dropped some weight then plateaued.  I began to research nutrition and fitness.  After enrolling in a local women's fitness class, I began to drop the weight that has been my ball and chain for my entire life.  I lost 70 pounds using whole food nutrition, weight training and cardio vascular exersize.   However, it has now been more that a year of being stuck at the same number on the scale and I am getting quite frustrated with the fight to be fit.  Is there really not a "magic" pill or shortcut?

I still struggle with the siren call of the cookie, cake, candy or pizza.  When I cave and eat them, my belly swells and the weight lunges up on the scale.  I am currently about 25 pounds heavier than I was at the end of summer.  I have been binging since labor day.  Fooling myself into thinking.  "Hey, I will go for a run later."  Later never seemed to come around.

TIME TO STOP THE MADNESS!!!  Today is now the day.  DAY 1 of bootcamp!  DAY 1 of healthy eating!  DAY 1 of the next step of the journey!